Graduation from High School is a once in a lifetime event. This event is a milestone more felt by the parents than the students who have been more than ready for the ‘school is out’ moment.
On a sunny afternoon, I attended my daughter’s high school graduation. We arrived at the football stadium two hours before the ceremony, and got ourselves the fourth row of seating, a bit off the center on the right. It was a sunny and beautiful California Spring day. Quite a few well-prepared parents have brought along umbrella and sunglasses; many invited relatives and friends to come along. In a way, the social atmosphere of high school graduation differed from middle school graduation, where conversations were more within family and family friends than across family groups. Parent involvements in school have faded as the kids moved on to high school; and our acquaintance, with teachers or other parents, was not as much as in the junior grades.
The stage set in front of the bench seats of a football field was nothing extraordinary; the choir and the orchestra added the expected musical elements. The special moments were the much awaited entrance of the 400+ graduate students, in graduation caps and gowns. As they took up the benches, the commencement began. The rundown was dominated by the diploma presentation mixing in with a couple of graduate students’ speech. The speech talked about we all matter in our own ways; and talked about the thankfulness in farewell. We all wait for the name of our children, with reaction widely different – from shouting, screaming, roaring to bull-horning, or simply a hearty applause.
As the graduation caps were thrown in the air, we all squeezed into the crowd to seek our family reunion. In pictu
re time, it was impossible to avoid extra persons in the background. Many desserts were on display at the refreshment tables, from brownies, macaroons, cupcakes, banana bread to different types of cookies. The sugary booster was fitting for the graduate students as they got ready for a night-out. The school bus would take them to a secret place and they would not be home until next morning. Is this also an experience for families to be ready for the many more nights ahead without the child sleeping under the same roof?
High school graduation marks a distinct transition towards independence and upcoming faraway venture. It is a significant milestone as a parent, though there is no real retirement of parenthood.
There is no lack of encouragement to ask many questions. That sometimes translates into effort to overcome a self-inflicted intimidation factor as people around are smart and young. The laissez faire culture nurtures self motivation and some never-enough sentiment though freedom also breeds insecurity and alignment issue. In comparison, the status report and weekly progress report, adopted in traditional companies, give more gravity, even it becomes counter-creative over time. A majority of hard-core engineers in a house don’t make much of a social environment, nor business-savvy organizations.
The longing of a dream is gone at the same time when the dream is realized. Friendly co workers warned, with certainty, a plateau would be ahead, and likely a sense of disorientation for a period of six to twenty four months (or forever). It is a new cycle to start from somewhere again. And one tends to morph into similar species of the surrounding. It reminds me of the beginning in another high-tech company many years ago.
be a stressful month for college-bound students and their parents – a month to choose which college to spend the next four years. Such a decision is weighty for a teenager and more so for the parents. College is expensive in US, the four years of education involve hundreds of thousands dollars even for public school. We don’t make such decision often in our life.
f the ‘site’ visit, there is the financial planning. College in US is outrageously expensive with 5-digits spending annually to cover tuition and boarding. If the parents do not provide, the students will be in a six-digit debt the day they graduate from a 4-year public college education. The more economic way to get a degree would be attending a 2-year community college, then transfer to a state college. Or they can crawl through thousands of scholarship opportunities, and that requires a level of motivation and hard work not often found in the teenagers of this generation. For parents who can afford to provide the 4-year, the debt-free students may not empathize the many years of parents’ hardwork to just afford their education.
decision making in the same way as their parents who are thirty more years older. The beauty of a youth is that they can afford some costly decision. In between supporting a teen’s decision vs dictating a decision, a final decision will be made by May 1st.
ne of my life to-do lists was checked-off. After many years of talking, we finally went to Indian Wells, California to watch the tennis master and to watch Roger Federer while he is still playing. Indian Wells are sometimes considered as the fifth slam in tennis, though not as well-known as the four major. The crowd was no less and this year more audience than that of French Open in Paris. It felt like Disneyland theme parks just two hours away from Indian Wells. There were lines to the food booths, lines to the stadium, lines for water refill; and things were pretty expensive. The whole atmosphere has been festive.
for his win and sad if he loses. This was unusual when we are used to root for underdogs in sports. The weather was in the 90s, so it took some physical strength to be an audience, as matches went from 11am to beyond 9pm. We were able to watch Federer both days, plus many other stars Williams, Djokovic, Nadal, Nishikori…. We are looking forward to a return trip next year and yet to decide whether we go for the early rounds or finals.
that the virus back then was more to take you down totally for a day or two days, then we were good again; now the virus seems to be more causing you discomfort
re, not lack of confidence, just more devices; we look ‘forward’ often to our computer. We look around less. And even less to stop and smell the roses.
this “Wellness Panel for Parents (of the teens)” with high school principal, assistant principal, a doctor and a psychologist on the panel, they share their thoughts on the many challenges facing parents and their teens. Many teenagers sleep far less than the recommended 8 to 9 hours. The pattern starts with a lack of enthusiasm in school (subjects), the stress to have to do well in grades, the mountains of homework and reading, puberty effect and the transition towards adulthood. These difficulties breed avoidance – when the school hours are over, the teens d
ecompress through games, internet, napping or other things but school work. As they start on homework in the late night, they finish by early morning, and in 5 hours or so, they are on the way to school again, totally sleep deprived and often without a decent breakfast. In the intertwining relationship between physical and mental state, an unhealthy youth is more prone to an unstable mental state; and vice versa. Aren’t parents helpless in getting our loved ones out of the blues and maybe at times, be part of giving them stress?
ework.
years. Many people talk about peak at some years, and from then onwards, it is all downhill. There is that gradual loss of abilities, physical or mental or both; there is that reduction of learning; there is that reaching quota on things that used to grasp our interests. For those who remember the green monitor about thirty years ago, the computer aging process feels different. It becomes slower, left alone, and then is being replaced. Its deterioration is not as unpleasant as human aging amidst illness or suffering or the burden of loved ones.
would think about it in future is most likely different from how I think about it now. Someone in Switzerland said of facilities to trade all the money with the life-long service to take care of you. When the day comes, the physical body and the financial asset go together.
ntain; and more often to improve. Easier to say than declaring a pure lack of talent, I have never got close to that time commitment, and expectedly, my skills are very far from where I want it to be. Human could be strange species, sometimes, we just want to keep pounding on things that we are not very good at.
and fans around the world for all the tournaments. Peers support him to win the “Stefan Edberg Sportsmanship Award” for a record 10 years; Fans support him to win the “Fans’ favorite Award” for a record and consecutive 12 years; and many places he plays, he receives “home court advantage” through the support and cheering of the spectators. There are often so much things to learn from– how he plays, how he faces adversities, how he faces the press, how he manages losses and wins. All can give inspirations to other facets of lives, if we so choose.
e to solve.
nother human being. There is relationship with a country, with a company or with an organization. Whatever it is, it takes some courage to get out of a long-term one.
half dream comes true may turn out to be different from the imagination. There is something missing in reality, a different reason on different days. It is like a bird in a tree-hopping mode, before sensing the right place worth to settle down again. I receive a good advice to write a new description of a dream job, which I believe applies to all job seekers.
oliviatamccue 